Trip Report Day 5: Whitewater Rafting and Harpoon Harry's

We woke up, ate breakfast and got our gear on for whitewater rafting. The location was 45 minutes away, so we had to get on the road. Our reservation was for 11:30 a.m. We drove for a while and past some not so touristy spots in Tennessee until we got to the Smoky Mountain Outdoors headquarters.

When we got there, we checked in and were told to wait in an area with a lot of picnic tables. While we were waiting, my dad said, "I want a guide with a beard." So, when they tried to call our name (they could not pronounce it), we got assigned to Birdman and sure enough, he had a serious beard.

Birdman gave us our life jackets and helmets. Of course, my dad and Uncle George put the life jackets on wrong, so we had a quick laugh. We were given a brief overview of the paddle and how we should keep our hand over the T-grip or we could knock our neighbor's teeth out. I made sure my hand never left the handle of the paddle.

We all hopped on the bus and headed up the Pigeon River to where we would get our raft in the water. TK and my dad were assigned to the front of the boat because they were the strongest of us and I sat behind TK. We asked our guide why they called him Birdman. He told us that he has an African Gray and he used to take the bird to a lot of events. Eventually, people would say, "Hey, did you see that bird, man?" And, eventually Birdman stuck.

When we finally got in the water, I shoved my foot so far under the center and side of the raft, that they got numb at one point. I did NOT want to fall out of the boat and I didn't want to get yelled at for doing something wrong. I listened to Birdman instruct us on how to paddle and the directives he might shout out during our trip. During the ride down the river, there would be up to Class 4 rapids. I believe Class 6 is the highest.

As we traveled down the river, Birdman told us what each area was called. There was Microwave, Razor Blade, Tombstone, Rollercoaster, Accelerator and Powerhouse, to name a few. We also learned about some of the ecology and history of the River. Birdman said that after the whole life jacket debacle, he was nervous, but we all did great paddling and he didn't have to do much work at all or yell at us to keep our hands on our T-grips. We kicked butt!

At the end, we were able to jump in the water when it was calm and we were just drifting, so I did. The water was very refreshing. When Birdman pulled me back in the boat, I got really embarrassed because I flew right on top of him. Something embarrassing happens to me every time I do something adventurous. When I went ziplining in Hawaii, I almost knocked the guide off the platform with my butt and when we went zorbing, I tried to jump in the ball and my hips got stuck. That's just my way. I made sure to ask Birdman if that happens every time he pulls someone in the boat and he reassured me that it does. PHEW!

The trip lasted around two hours and we had a great time. I was able to check another item off of my life list. The only complaint I had was that Birdman never asked us our names ... I found that odd. I guess he didn't want to get to know us. That's too bad because we are pretty cool.

While we were driving back to the resort, we passed by the Bell Mason Jar factory and the Bush's Beans headquarters, factory and visitors' center in Dandridge, Tennessee. Too bad we didn't stop. I want to go there next time we visit because, honestly, I like beans. When we got to Pigeon Forge, we stopped at Arby's because we were all starving and we don't have one close to home. Also, my mother was not with us. She doesn't like Arby's.

When we got back to the resort, we showered and got ready to head out to Harpoon Harry's for dinner. It was pretty empty and the food was delicious. We had a nice quiet dinner with a few televisions to entertain us. I had a very refreshing beer and felt very relaxed afterward. We headed back to the resort and called it a night. 

Trip Report Day 4: Dollywood

We got up, got ready and headed over to breakfast at Shoney's. The waitress was not as smiley as we are accustomed to in Tennessee, but it was a hearty breakfast as we prepared for a full day at Dollywood. Unfortunately, I found a splinter in my finger and tried my hardest to get it out, but failed miserably and it was hurting a little. Everyone yelled at me to leave it alone, so I finally did.

After breakfast we made it over to Dollywood. We drove through the parking lot and saw no cars, so we were wondering if it was even open. Well, it was and it had the perfect amount of people ... practically none. I had bought the tickets online before we arrived in Tennessee, so I was all set with ours. Fortunately, Jackson and Addison were free.

Immediately after passing through the turnstiles, a sweet Dollywood employee overheard me asking about their baby care center and gave me directions to it. I headed right over to it and was able to change Addison quickly, quietly and cleanly. It was lovely. I love theme parks that care about moms with young children (Disney has them too). It really makes my life easier.

My mom took Addison and got directions to the first aid station, so I could get my splinter out. It was the first time I had ever visited a first aid station in a theme park. It was quick and painless, almost enjoyable.

Eventually, after caring for Addison and me, we finally were able to get on a ride and we chose Smoky Mountain River Rampage. Jackson was actually able to ride, but he was seriously afraid and only started to ease up after my mother and I got soaked. He didn't love the ride, but he visited the family clothing dryer with us to see if it could dry us up a little bit. It failed and we just looked like a group of idiots standing in a box. Unfortunately, a lot of attractions were closed because of the light crowd.

We decided to keep the ride action going and went over to the Rockin' Roadway. Jackson was able to ride on this too and he shared a car with TK. He kept reminding him to, "Go easy, Daddy. Go easy!" I rode in a car with my mom and tried to wave at them the whole time, but Jackson was too focused on having a calm ride that he didn't notice. He was done with rides after that and walked right by all of the children's rides. The adults rode Demolition Derby and gave each other whiplash, but we had a great time laughing. My dad and I got Jackson on the carousel and he cried the ENTIRE TIME. That was about as much fun as a root canal. After that, we gave up on rides for Jackson. Instead, my family spent $100 on all of the carnival games. They came out with a very expensive stuffed Minion and a giraffe, and a Florida Gators football.

For lunch, we went to Miss Lillian's Chicken House because we went to Aunt Granny's the last time we were there. The food was pretty tasty and I really do love that macaroni salad is a side dish in a lot of Tennessee restaurants. By this time, Addison was getting pretty cranky, so I walked her around until she fell asleep. Then, TK, Uncle George and I rode Blazing Fury, which wasn't all that exciting. It needs an upgrade. TK and I rode Firechaser Express and that was a lot of fun. It went forward and backward. As we walked out from Firechaser, TK tried his best to convince me to ride Wild Eagle. I watched it go around and it looked intense. I finally said yes and we got right on with no wait. I screamed the entire time and it was kind of cathartic to be able to scream at the top of my lungs. TK loved it and convinced Uncle George to ride it with him. It was one of the best rollercoasters that I've ever experienced.

When we were done with the rides, we looked for some snacks and headed toward the front of the park. I picked up some Peach Amaretto Pecan Honey Butter because the salesman was really good at his job and the honey butter was delicious. My aunt got her funnel cake, my dad got a float and TK got a sundae. There was an apple pie there that was 25 pounds and once slice was $18.99. It was monstrous. We made one last loop through the souvenir shop and then we were out. We had a long, tiring, yet really fun day.

Trip Report Day 3: Indoor Water Park and The Island

When we woke up, we all got our bathing suits on and headed to Cracker Barrel for breakfast and a little shopping since we bought my mother a gift card for her 60th birthday. They always have such cute baby items and seasonal decor. It is a fun place to shop and eat.

Afterward, we took a quick drive through downtown Gatlinburg and then headed to Wild Bear Falls within our resort. Wild Bear Falls is an indoor water park that we weren't able to visit the last time. We received passes for the entire week because my parents are Westgate timeshare owners. 

We had a great time splashing around. Jackson loved the kiddie area where he could run through sprinklers and splash down slides. In the kiddie area, the water was only ankle high and it was pretty warm, so it was really nice for the little ones. I was able to sit in the water with Addison and it barely covered her legs. Jackson went through the lazy river with us, after a little bit of a struggle. When Jackson needed to rest and Addison had to eat, TK and I went down the slide on a double tube and I laughed hysterically the whole time. One time, I went underwater and TK and the tube ended up on top of my head. It was a lot of fun and I swallowed a lot of water.

When Jackson was ready to play again, I took him over to the hot tub with my parents and uncle. He just sat at the edge and put his feet in. After we had our fill of the hot water, we went back to where we were set up and TK and I went up to the snack bar for drinks and a bite. Oddly, everything cost $5.49 each. Drinks? Pretzel Bites? Wine? $5.49. We left shortly after and headed back to the room to shower off. 

After we all were dressed and ready, we headed over to The Island in Pigeon Forge. There, we ate at Margaritaville. Most of us ordered margaritas and my mother even had a Bahama Mama. As we were leaving and I was getting Addison situated back in her stroller, I banged my head really hard on the staircase overhead. I saw stars and my teeth hurt; that's how hard I hit it. I had a bump for a few days. 

We walked around and visited a few shops throughout The Island. There were a variety of stores and we didn't actually buy anything, but we did buy Spaghetti Ice Cream from Poynor's Pommes Frites. It was so cool looking, but essentially, a tasty ice cream sundae. 

Included with the shops was Ole Smoky Tennessee Moonshine and we met Uncle George and Aunt Rosie for a tasting. Some of the flavors were brutal, but others were pretty smooth, especially the Shine Nog. We made sure to buy a bottle later in the week. 

Afterward, we watched the dancing fountains and went over to get a drink at Dick's Last Resort. The servers are supposed to belittle you, but we had a nice conversation with the bartender and a couple by the bar. We told my parents that we would meet them at 7:15 p.m. at the Margaritaville coffee shop, so we had to leave after one drink. We played cards again before bed.

                      

Trip Report Day 2: Getting Settled

After breakfast at Flapjack's, we had energy and continued on to our resort to check in. My parents own a timeshare, so our stay was at Westgate Smoky Mountains Resort and Spa. We received a two bedroom and a connecting one bedroom. Each room had a balcony that overlooked the Smoky Mountains and it is a gorgeous view. TK and I took the bedroom downstairs for us and the kids, and my parents took the bedroom upstairs. My aunt and uncle took the one bedroom. 

We all unpacked and decided that we all needed a hot shower, separately of course. Fortunately, our bathroom had two showerheads, so it felt wonderful to step in and get sprayed with warmth from all directions. I would love to have that at home, but it may lead to really long showers and possible fainting spells.

After we all showered and changed, separately, we headed out to Walmart to get some essentials. Walmart is always better in the south. I made sure to get water and milk for the kids. By then, we were hungry for dinner, even though it was still the afternoon. We went to Bennett's Pit Bar-B-Que because it had pretty good reviews during the research phase of my planning. It proved to be delicious and you know how I enjoy patting myself on the back. This was another good choice.

After our meal, TK and I went to find the grocery store for Tennessee's "build your own six pack" deal that I remembered from five years ago. We got really lost and ended up in the Smoky Mountains National Park. Whoops! So, after some accidental site seeing, we made a U-turn and finally found Food City. We brought back beer and a cake.

To end the night, we played poker and then all went to bed. 

Trip Report Day 1: Traveling to Tennessee

We got on the road at 8 p.m. with a fully packed car, complete with one infant, a toddler, an activity mat, four duffle bags, bags of books, an Avengers backpack, a cooler bag, a snack bag and a portable DVD player. We had everything we needed ... and more.

Unfortunately, we hit traffic in Staten Island and added an hour to a trip that should take around 12 hours. Finally, we met Uncle George and Aunt Rosie in Pennsylvania and I was able to feed and change Addison on the folded down seat in front of me. She was in good spirits, thankfully.

The next time we stopped was in Virginia at 2 a.m. to get gas and some snacks. I actually found the elusive Little Debbie Peanut Butter Sandwich Pies that I've heard about, but have never seen. They were good, just a little sweeter than I'd hoped.

There was something really peaceful and serene about sitting in the back of a car staring out the window into the darkness at a foreign location in the middle of the night. 

We stopped one more time to change Addison, but by then we were in Tennessee and needed a meal. We started our stay in Tennessee with breakfast at Flapjack's in Pigeon Forge. We had eaten there five years prior, so we knew it would be good. It was the perfect way to start the day.