I just can't decide whether or not I am dressing up this year. Should I be Slash, a zombie or nothing at all?
I am really not feeling it. Halloween isn't the happiest, most fun day of the year for me. In 2006 the holiday changed for me. As you may have read in a past post or two, my very good friend Tom committed suicide on Halloween four years ago and since then, I haven't been able to catch the excitement that others feel.
Halloween used to be a holiday that I looked forward to because the parties were fun and the costumes were creative. When I was a kid, I loved to trick-or-treat because I walked around the development with my uncle as our chaperone. I couldn't wait to get home from school to head out with my uncle, my brother and my cousins. That's what my memories of Halloween are made of.
Now, dressing up and partying is OK for other days of the year, but Halloween is not what it used to be for me. The days leading up to the 31st are always filled with thoughts of Tom and sadness. I miss him all the time, but mostly around this holiday, for obvious reasons.
So, I am thinking I may just sit this year out because partying just doesn't seem right and it probably won't until I have my own child to dress up. (I miss you Tom.)
