Bug 1; Melissa 0

These past few days have been less than fun. Let's just say I wouldn't wish this on anyone.

On Sunday afternoon/early evening, I started to feel a little crampy in my stomach. I chocked it up to eating too much all at once at dinner (I've been known to do that), but it didn't end and it actually got worse. I got the bug ...

From then on, I was in bad shape. I will spare you the glamorous details, but that virus was awful and I thought I was going to die. I haven't had a stomach virus for 20 years, at least. I was shocked because I've eaten tuna fish sandwiches from 7-11, fruit that I haven't washed, rare hamburgers and I try everything at least once. My stomach is usually cast iron with no issues, but this time a bug got the best of me and I lost in a big way. I am hoping that I lost some weight also as a two-day bulimic/anorexic, but we will see.

Now, I am a little sheepish to go out to dinner or take a fork to a rich meal, but I will get back on my fat horse very soon.

How about we hand out trophies for winning, for a change

Now that we are parents, TK and I have decided that the trophies that our children get for just showing up and participating are going right in the garbage. They may not even make it to the garbage at home. I may throw them out in the parking lot of the baseball, soccer or football field. A trophy for participation is not real life.

Would your boss have you compete against another colleague for a promotion and give it to the both of you because you "participated?" No, because that is not how things work in the real world. In the real world, there are winners and losers, and if you lose this time, you will try harder for next time.

Children should learn about discipline and disappointment. Coaches become motivators and disciplinarians on the field or court. They teach children that if they show up late to a game or do not participate in a practice, they do not play. It is not fair for the person that shows up 15 minutes early for every practice and a half hour early for each game to sit on the bench while a player who showed up 45 minutes late plays in a game. In the real world, if you are late to work numerous times or do not show up, you can get fired and for good cause.

The little league field should prepare our little athletes for real life. So, coaches that allow all kids to play regardless of their lateness to practices or games are doing children (and parents) a disservice and giving them a false sense of entitlement. I would prefer a coach that benches my child for lateness than a coach that just lets it go. There are teaching moments throughout our lives, and I have had plenty on the field or the court. For instance, fouling out of a basketball game showed me that my actions have repercussions. Striking out meant that I was not focusing. And, letting a ground ball roll through my legs meant that I was not keeping my glove down or using the tactics taught to me in practice. When I lost a game, it felt awful and there were times that I even cried, but those losses lit a fire inside me to want to win and I strived to accomplish that goal. I will not take those feelings from my children.

So, I repeat, there are teachable moments throughout our lives and our children's lives. Make use of them and prepare our children for a responsible, successful and respectful future. And, if you want our children's trophies, you can have them because they mean nothing, unless they actually earn them.

Getting Organized

My little guy is growing and growing, and I don't care what those percentiles mean that I hear at the pediatrician. He is eight and a half months old and in nine month clothing now. So, it seems like he is on par for his age.

Today, I decided to organize Jax's ever-growing clothing collection. I started with the bins in the garage and noticed that I already labeled one of them that contained all of his clothes from newborn to three months and his summer and fall outfits that he had grown out of. His old clothes were so small and cute, and I kind of miss those days, but we are having a ton of fun now so I prefer now to then. There were two other bins in the garage that needed organizing, so I took them out and took every piece of clothing out and made size piles. When my friends give me their kids' hand-me-downs, I take them and pack them away, but I don't really go through them until Jax jumps sizes. Well, this time, I went through every piece and made three bins: 12-18 months, 18-24 months and 24 months +. I had to make sure I wanted all the clothes that were in there and that none of them had stains. None of the clothes had been washed by me and that is fine because when the time comes, I will just do a couple loads of wash and Jax will have a whole new armoire of clothes to wear.

I also like to go to thrift shops and secondhand stores to buy Jax's clothes, even if the clothes can't be worn for a year or more. Baby and toddler clothes are always in pretty good shape in those stores because A. babies grow out of clothes fast, B. moms donate what they don't like or C. moms donate clothes because they cannot take them back to the store without the original tags. My kid grows fast too, so I don't understand spending a lot of money on an outfit that he may wear once or twice.

Jax may be all set for the next year or so with clothes, but his ensemble will probably double in size a few times over by the time he is three. My mom always comes home from a store with something for him, Joey Russo is growing out of his clothes and so is Grady Thompson. So, we're good for another year and a half ... unless there's a sale.

Fighting Like a Girl

When I was a teenager, I wanted my father to teach me how to box because his father boxed and I was fascinated by the artistry of some fighters, but he refused. His argument was that girls would definitely hit me back and it wouldn't feel good. He also convinced me that punches would leave marks on my face and I wouldn't look the same. It made sense because I have a big Italian nose and one dead on punch to my nose would probably break it instantly. OK Dad, I get it. However, he did teach me how to defend myself when put in the position to and I am thankful for that.

Ronda Rousey, UFC Bantamweight Champion

Not every Saturday, but some Saturday nights I watch UFC fights, and when it is on, I watch the Ultimate Fighter Competition with my husband. Some people think it is barbaric, but I think it is entertaining and a legitimate sport. These fighters are trained in mixed martial arts (MMA) which includes fighting while standing up (striking) and while on the ground (grappling). The menu of experience for the fighters includes boxing, judo, Brazilian jiu jitsu, wrestling, kickboxing and karate. There may be other fighting techniques, but these are the ones I know of.

Now, when I say I like watching MMA, I mean that I like watching fights with submissions, ground and pound and boxing, but there are some fights that bother me because I am still a mother and a female. For instance, I hate when a fighter hammer punches another fighter's face until the fighter flops around like a rag doll. It can be disturbing. I picture this person's mother having to watch her son getting beat until unconscious and it breaks my heart. (Note: a hammer punch is a punch that uses the under part of a person's fist as if they were swinging a hammer.)

This month, UFC 157 included a female fight as the main event for the first time and it introduced Ronda Rousey and Liz Carmouche to the UFC. I told TK that we were ordering this fight on Pay Per View because I just HAD to watch. The inclusion of a female fight on a UFC card is a huge achievement for female athletes. They are paving the way for other females in yet another male-dominated sport. To end the fight, Rousey won due to an arm bar in the first round. (Note: an arm bar is a submission move that hyper-extends a person's arm to the point that it might break if they do not tap out.) After watching the fight, I wanted to learn about the personality behind the fighter so I watched YouTube videos that a colleague sent me. The emotional back stories and intensive training regimens were impressive and I became a fan. Rousey is even an Olympic judo champion. These girls are no joke!

So, next time you say someone "fights like a girl," think of Ronda Rousey and how she can flip over a 200-pound man and put him in an arm bar without messing up her hair. It's OK to be impressed.

Momtrepreneur-to-be

Yesterday, I took the first step to becoming a momtrepreneur, or whatever you want to call it. I took one step toward having a home office with orders coming in over the phone and through email and meetings via Skype where I can wear a blazer on top and flannel plaid PJ pants on the bottom, without anyone knowing the difference. OK, maybe that's all just a dream, but I did really start an Etsy shop. Yea, it may be something small, but it is something.

It says on my resumé that I have an art degree from Penn State, but I haven't used it since I designed promotional materials for Langistic Networks, and I am starting to piss myself off. I never wanted art to become a weekend hobby. I wanted art to be my talent and then become my career, but that obviously never happened. Well, fast forward 11 years and here I am with a husband, a house, a son, a master's degree, and a 7+ year career in public relations with no art anywhere. I enter my drawings in exhibits, but they were created years ago and I never even received an offer on one of them.

I am not quitting. I am an artist and that's what I've wanted to be since I was four-years-old, so I started an Etsy shop that I opened up by selling bottle cap magnets and photography prints of pictures that I've been taking for years on my DSLR. Eventually, I will add drawings, watercolor studies and maybe even portraits that I can do on a commission basis. It is a start. It may not be a six-figure salary or a home office, but it is something. I will not let my creativity flat line, especially at 32-years-old with a NEED to create. My Pinterest account is exploding. 

So, my Etsy shop is named MAK80 and it can be found at: www.etsy.com/shop/MAK80. Take a look and support a rebounding and rejuvenating artist, I mean, if you want.

Fifty Shades of Annoyance

For my 32nd birthday, my husband bought me the Fifty Shades trilogy. So, I read Fifty Shades of Gray and Fifty Shades Darker and liked them both, but then I got to Fifty Shades Freed and, to be honest, I am still on it. I got through the first few chapters, and that was about it. The little pebbles of annoyance that I saw passed in the first two books grew to the size of a boulder in book three.

 

Not every word was bad, don't get me wrong. During the first two books, I appreciated the highly imaginative descriptions and interactions, even though they were mostly sexual. I also liked that it was reminiscent of Pretty Woman, with a rich businessman falling in love with a quirky female who needs to find her way. The Christian Grey is jealous, has control issues and has sex with Anastasia Steele on a piano, so I saw an obvious Pretty Woman likeness. I mean, she even wears a grey tie for him ... really?

Now, those pebbles that I was talking about, yes, they exist and I will list them for you. First, the whole thing is unrealistic, especially Christian Grey's salary. I calculated that he would make $208 million a year or more, by making $100K an hour with added investments. That seems a little crazy. Second, I disliked how she mentioned his frown or his "straight-lipped smile" every other page. We get it, he makes facial expressions. He is a human being with full musculoskeletal control of his face. Got it. Also, it's annoying that Anastasia personifies her subconscious and has it wearing "Burberry" with its "arms crossed." What? That's just silly. And the final thing that had me saying, "Enough already," was the sex. They have SO much sex. On a bed. In a car. In the torture chamber (that's what I call it). In the bathtub. On the bathroom floor. I mean, it is A LOT. This is an erotic novel, so I understand that there has to be sex and plenty of it, but with all of this sex, someone should have a UTI by now or even a yeast infection. Sorry to go there, but it's true.

So, Fifty Shades Freed is on my nightstand collecting dust because Anastasia Steele and E.L. James are like my husband's snoring: OK in small spurts, but really annoying when it doesn't stop. E.L. you were alright at two books or you could have just killed off Ana in book three. Just saying.

A Lifetime of Travels ... Disney Travels

My family and I have recently discussed the possibility of traveling to Walt Disney World again in 2013 and I am ALL for it, as per usual. And, this time, for the first time, I will be bringing a toddler because Jackson will be a little over a year old when we want to go. I cannot wait to see WDW through his little, innocent, open eyes. Luckily for me, I have done it all, so I will not care if he wants to splash around in a fountain for an hour, go back to the hotel room for a nap or stand in line to meet Mickey. However, if he is anything like me when I was a toddler, he will be frightened of the characters and run in the other direction. But, as an infant, he already stays awake when we have company over so that he doesn't "miss" anything, just like his mama, so we may be doing A LOT.

Like I said, I have an extensive Disney history. I have been to Walt Disney World 13 times and to Disneyland once, and every time was wonderful. There were times I just went with my parents and my brother; with just TK; with my parents, TK and my aunt and uncle; and one time with 13 family members. So, here is my list, in chronological order with the places I stayed also listed:

1. 1983 - Orlando Vacation Resort (with parents, brother, Uncle Beaver and Viola)
2. 1986 - Days Lodge in Old Town (with parents and brother)
3. 1989 - Polynesian Resort and Las Palmas (with parents, brother and grandmother)
4. 1991 - Caribbean Beach Resort (with parents and brother)
5. 1993 - All Star Sports Resort (with parents and brother)
6. 1995 - All Star Music Resort (with parents and brother)
7. 1997 - Dixie Landings Resort (now Port Orleans Riverside) (with parents and brother)
8. 2003 - Westgate Vacation Villas (with TK)
9. 2004 - Pop Century Resort (with 13 family members)
10. 2006 - Swan Hotel and Caribbean Beach Resort (with parents, TK, Uncle George and Aunt Rosie)
11. 2007 - Pop Century Resort (with TK, Georgie, Jade, Bob and Cissy) Got engaged!
12. 2009 - Saratoga Springs Resort (with parents, TK, Uncle George and Aunt Rosie)
13. 2011 - Kidani Village Resort (with parents, TK, Uncle George, Aunt Rosie and Georgie)

As you can see, I have stayed on-site a number of times and I think that is the best way to go because you get the luxury of the Magical Express, bus, monorail and boat transportation. You also get the benefit of package delivery to your hotel, so you don't have to lug your purchases around the parks all day. But, the main reason I like staying on property is that I can enter the world of Disney and not have to leave and come back. When I am in, I am in until we check out.

Now that my family belongs to the Disney Vacation Club, vacations have gotten more and more exciting because we stay on-site during every visit and we have the ability to try more things. For instance, during our 2011 trip, we were able to embark on the "Backstage Safari" at Animal Kingdom Lodge and get up close to the giraffes, zebras, ostriches, etc. and then enjoy a multi-course dinner with wine pairings. It was expensive, but it was wonderful!

So, next year, I am hoping to do something I've never done before ... bring my son to Walt Disney World as a mother. It will be a whole new world for me. (Get it? "A Whole New World." It is a Disney reference. Anyway ...) I can't wait!